There's this concept about true love and soulmates. It says that for one person on this earth; there is always another meant for them. The only one condition. You must find them yourselves. How do you find them you ask? "You just know", is what you mostly get to hear.
At the age of 9, I was completely obsessed with the idea of someday finding my soulmate. I had it all written out it my head. How they would look like, how they would be as a person, their background, and how we would meet.
It was something I was determinated to find as soon as possible.
I was also very much convinced that the first guy I will ever meet and have some sort of romantic connection with, is my soulmate.
At the age of 13, I crushed on a guy I had nothing in common with, except the fact that he was approachable and easy, in the sense of seeing him often. I fell in love with all of the things I thought he was. I obsessed over him for probably longer than a year and it took me almost the same amount of time to get over him.
I stayed in love with him all through his failed relationships and hoped that one day, I would be the relationship that wouldn’t fail.
At the age of 15, I fell in love with the most adorable boy, who so desperately wanted to be a man as fast as he could. I stayed with him from braces and baby fat all through handsome looks and muscles. We shared dreams and ideals together. We thought about a future together that seemed too good to be true.
This is the first time I ever said this but I wasn’t entirely honest with who I was as a person to him. All the interests that we had in common almost felt forced but I never thought much of it at that time.
Not that it matters anymore because after a very long time in each others love and company, things went wrong, trust became shattered, and hearts have been broken. And that’s how he fell out of the love I desperately tried to keep alive along with the promises we once made to each other.
This was also the age that I have grown attached to possibly the most important person in my life. It started with hate for each other which we both figured out wasn’t really hate at all to begin with.
I bet a ton of people have had similiar situations in which they have met their best friends but ours stays iconic.
I sleep, eat, and wake up somehow always feeling connected to her. I don’t think there is anyone else in the world who knows me as well as she does and who I’d love to be stuck with for the rest of my life.
And I don’t think I’ve ever had a friendship this intense.
At the age of 17, I met the man I have grown to love.
In the weeks that I almost decided to give my love away to the wrong guy, is when he came into my life.
Nothing has ever felt more real than this.
And yes we share dreams, ideals and think of a future together… The difference is that this time I am honest. With him and myself.
Although I may not know if this will work out or not, this is something I know I’m willing to risk. The love he surrounds me with is something I don’t think I’d want to be without.
True love just isn’t something I believe could be found in one person and one person only.
Because with each and every one of these people, I have experienced love I know to be true.